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Mental Health

40

I’m finally forty, thank fuck
The way I toyed with death, I’ve been an absolute schmuck
Neurosis, psychosis, paralysis, I could have been hit by a truck
I did not succumb, I managed to triumph, that was just dumb luck

No fanfare, no frills
All I hear is the devil’s trill
Reminding me of them formative years
The feuds that led to four decades of tears

I’m finally forty, I’ve been furiously feeding the fear
That nobody can love me, no one’s been near
I was feigning my fervour, really, life’s worn me to a frazzle
There is little left that can truly dazzle

I could fabricate a fantasy
Image there’d be no further fury
Stop chasing a life that pursues fatality
I’ve made it this far despite all animosity
Diss me if you like, this is indeed my reality

I’m finally forty, it’s all gone by like a flash
Please no more pain, not of the mind nor of the flesh
Anyhow I can always count on time being finite
Come what may, at least now I have some insight
(Even with my fading eyesight)

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